1The LORD Barack is my provider; I shall not want to keep my money.
2He maketh me to sit down and shut up: he leadeth me with open pockets beside the tax coffers.
3He restoreth my childhood dependence on others: he leadeth me in the paths of socialism for his name's sake.
4Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of terrorism, I will fear no evil: for Barack art with me and has convinced me evil simply does not exist; thy two autobiographies and thy stuttering speeches they comfort me.
5Thou preparest a table for others with my tax money in the presence of your friends in Palestine and Oprah: thou anointest my face with a slap if I question you; my bloody nose runneth over.
6Surely pain and regret shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the public housing of the LORD Barack for ever.