If I Were President

My 8 year old girl R completed a 1st grade school project, “If I Were President.” It’s a 7 page packet with lead-ins for each panel, and a space for her to add her thoughts and ideas. In 2040, please consider her as you vote for US President.

If I Were President by R

If I were President, the first thing I would do is:
Help everyone. But I would not take money from the rich and give it to the poor. Because the poor did not earn that money.

If I were President, I would eat:
good things like broclie, corn and beons.

If I were President, I would travel to:
Hawaii and Montana.

If I were President, I would have a pet:
dog and cat named Bella and Nickey.

If I were President, I would pass a law that: There would be no bullying! (I guess they don’t teach 1st graders yet that Presidents don’t pass laws).

If I were President, I would help: everyone. (Not just ACORN and the unions. OK- that last bit was mine).

Final Comments: I don’t think I would like to be the President. I think it is too much work! I mean, I would love to help people, but it would not work.

Sickness Comes On Horseback

… and departs on foot. An old Dutch proverb. And a truth we’re living in our family right now.

The sickness began more than a week ago. The youngest feeling tired and wanting to go to bed early. A fever the next morning. Continues fever for a week. Flu. My wife with a very bad case of sinus infection.

Then the fevers, ear infections, missed church and school continued. And to one degree or another its all still here in the household.

It’s been a very bad week and a half around here. And I have personally evaded all the bugs. I hope I make it through unscathed.

Who’s That Girl?

Last week Franklin High School’s choirs put on a “Winter Performance” (winter of course being code word for CHRISTMAS). We dropped off our little K-girl and headed to dinner while the choir prepared for the evening.

I took Michelle and the three other girls to dinner at our favorite Thai spot- Chlay’s. We always enjoy seeing the owner Suwane (most people call her Pam) and catching up on family news.

After dinner, and placing an advance to-go order that we would pick up for K-girl on the way home after the concert, we headed down the road to Franklin High School. We took our seats and awaited the beginning of the show, Sony HandyCam at the ready of course.

I was a bit shocked. While I was certain we had dropped off little K-girl, what I saw on stage and on the viewer screen was not her. I saw an amazingly beautiful young woman. Absolutely gorgeous (she gets that from her mom for sure), and looking way to mature for my little girl.

It took me a full 5 minutes to recover. Flashing through my mind were images of a newborn K-girl crying at the bright hospital lights and then settling down as I shielded her eyes. Our little toddler pointing at everything in sight and awaiting the proper word and intonation from her mom or me. The stunning 5 year old trotting off to kindergarten with barely a glance back at us. And the uncoordinated and goofy tweenager starting to struggle with increasingly hard homework and the intricate web of life I call the female social structure.

She’s growing up way to fast. It’s no longer years and years ahead of us having this precious person in our daily life… we’re down to months now. About 32 of them. Oh man, this is starting to get real hard.

The Lost Generations

This past Friday the last of three generations of family members passed away.

I had the pleasure of getting to know and spend time with Great Grandma Clara, Great Uncle Raymond, Grandfather James and Grandmother Dorothy, Grandfather Antony and Grandmother Astrid and Great Uncle Richard.

My Great Uncle Raymond was the last of those family members, on both sides of my family, older than my parents that was still alive.

He was such an amazing link to the past. A true world traveler, merchant marine during WWII and beyond through retirement. He told stories of ports of call from the USSR to China, the Horn of Africa to Alaska, Australia to Thailand.

My parents rushed down to Florida to be with him. The hospital reported that he was only a few days away from leaving us. On Friday my sister Natalie flew down from the DC area and arrived just an hour or so after he died.

He was a good man. Kind, loving, dedicated to the family, and always there to help out in many ways.



I have such great memories of staying in his guest house as a kid in Miami, of Christmas Eve orange picking when his grove was hit by a freeze, of hanging out at his lake house in Umatilla FL and watching for the ever elusive alligator that haunted the neighborhood.


He will be, is, greatly missed, and I mourn for the lost generations of wisdom and experience from our family.

One of the things I loved most about him was his cool and calm demeanor and deadpan style. It was nearly impossible to tell when he was being dead serious, or when he was delivering the heapingest pile of BS you ever heard but were convinced it was true because of the delivery.

Even in his final years, well beyond 80, he cracked me up. Just recently he got a traffic ticket in Florida for not coming to a complete stop at a stop sign.

The policeman pulled him over and asked for his license and registration then asked Uncle Raymond if he knew why he pulled him over.

Uncle Raymond: “Yes.”

The policeman: “You didn’t come to a full stop at the stop sign. Didn’t you see it?”

Uncle Raymond: “Yes.”

Policeman: “Well, why didn’t you stop?”

Uncle Raymond: “If I’d seen you, I would’ve."

12 year old Raymond Dennis at his childhood home on
Brasher Avenue in Nashville. He's holding his dearly loved "Buck the dog."
The date is September 1936, and he has his whole life ahead of him.

We Are Now Dog People

I grew up with dogs my whole life. I can barely remember the ones from my early years- Chocolate (killed by a neighbor with a shotgun when he messed in his yard once too often), Smoky, a Dalmatian, and then Daisy. Our cute cocka-poo.

She was followed by Ringo that on well beyond the time I moved out from home.

And that was it, for more than 20 years, until a few weeks ago.




We have a tradition where each of our girls gets to choose their heart’s desire for their 13th birthday gift (you can read more about that here), and L chose a dog. We spent several months thinking about the breed to get and finally found a cute Yorkshire Terrier pup.



I fought it off for along time… fearing the dog-smell and inevitable messes around the house, but I finally gave in.

Our new little girl, Bella, has already found a place in all of our hearts, despite her insistence to not use the facilities outside.

Crazy Girls

I have four daughters. They are all insane. The evidence?

Exhibit A: Video evidence

Exhibit B: They all said it was ok for me to post this video.


I love them dearly, but they sure can be goofballs. And I love that about them too.

The Shadow Proves The Sunshine

Switchfoot’s “Shadow Proves The Sunshine” is one of my favorite tunes. Check out the lyrics below, and you can listen to the recording at the very bottom of the home page if you like. The shadows proving the Sunshine in the attached photo are of my family at Yellowstone Park this past summer.

Sunshine, won't you be my mother
Sunshine, come and help me sing
My heart is darker than these oceans
My heart is frozen underneath

We are crooked souls trying to stay up straight,
Dry eyes in the pouring rain
The shadow proves the sunshine
The shadow proves the sunshine

Two scared little runaways
Hold fast to the break of day light where
The shadow proves the sunshine

Oh Lord, why did you forsake me?
Oh Lord, don't be far away away
Storm clouds gathering beside me
Please Lord, don't look the other way

Crooked souls trying to stay up straight
Dry eyes in the pouring rain
The shadow proves the sunshine
The shadow proves the sunshine

Two scared little runaways
Hold fast to the break of day light where
The shadow proves the sunshine
The shadow proves the sunshine

Yeah Yeah, shine on me
Yeah Yeah, shine on me
Yeah Yeah, shine on me
Yeah Yeah, shine on me

Crooked souls trying to stay up straight
Dry eyes in the pouring rain
The shadow proves the sunshine
The shadow proves the sunshine

Two scared little runaways
Hold fast to the break of day light where
The shadow proves the sunshine
The shadow proves the sunshine

Yeah Yeah, shine on me
Yeah Yeah, shine on me
Yeah Yeah, shine on me

Shine on me,
Let my shadows prove the sunshine

Bug Sounds And Bats

Today was a wonderfully pleasant day.

It started out a bit off-center for me as my suggestion to have our Sunday school class start a Nooma film and discussion series was met with approval from our two class leaders. They liked the idea and asked me to lead it. Today was the first day- we watched Rain 001 and chatted about the film and its message for more than an hour.

After church we headed to Sportsmans Grill for lunch and then home for some time in the pool. I cleaned all the charred grass from my mower and then pressure washed a few things before taking a dip.

After several hours we decided to grill some bratwurst for dinner and eat outside. As we wrapped up dinner and the sun was setting, our nearby bat colony came out for dinner. Sometimes we can see 10 or more swooping through the air eating bugs. We love them since they keep the mosquito population near zero even though we have a creek on one side of our property, and a river back behind us.

Our 6 year old R asked an interesting question as we let dinner settle and watched the bats. “If we make a sound like a bug, will the bats come and bite us?”

Memorial Day Olympics

On Memorial Day we went a step further than your ordinary backyard barbeque.

We invited family and friends over for a feast including hamburgers, hotdogs, chicken satay, Italian sausage, and all the trimmings, followed by some vigorous exercise to work off the massive carbohydrate, protein and fat intake.

The exercise? Backyard Olympics. I warned everyone ahead of time, and all said they were eager to join in. But when the appointed time arrived the complaints poured in. Evidently everyone ate too much and wanted to just sit down and get lazy. I insisted, and bullied everyone outside to start the games.

We had a total of 16 people, making 3 teams of 5 work quite well (the sixteenth player was my 2 year old nephew... he was kind of a floater, playing, or not playing, as the mood struck him, for any team he happened to be near.

The scoreboard was laid out meticulously, and the teams predetermined (and vetted by my wife and kids) to ensure skills, abilities, and the lack thereof, were spread evenly amongst the teams.

Of course I was somehow able to make sure Mike (my sister-in-law’s boyfriend), a police officer and former 101st Airborne member, was on my team. Funny how that worked out.

We won.

Wii For Christmas- Play

With the 7 hours of set-up done, the fun began. I wouldn’t say Wii’ve been playing it non-stop…but once Wii get on it, its hard to get off.

Tons of games came with the system Santa delivered, and already the suggestion has been made by more than one child that family board game night be replaced with Wii night.

Wii’re having a blast. Gotta go.

Wii For Christmas- Work

A Wii was the big gift from Santa Claus this Christmas for our whole family. Wii are a bit late to the party- seems the system was a big hit earlier in 2007, and Michelle and I only played it once prior when we were at a friends house for a party, but we loved it.

We were glad Santa had delivered this gift instead of what a few other folks we know went through. My brother-in-law got up EARLY the day after Thanksgiving to get to Wal-mart at 5AM to buy one, only to arrive and find them sold out.

Several other folks I knew couldn’t land one, and on a couple occasions in the last several weeks when I stopped in stores to scope one out (and the prices) there were none to be found. I overheard store clerks tell customers there were no more in Nashville. I found a website that updated hourly on Wii availability around the country- both in stores and online. I looked for a day or two and couldn’t find any.

Then somehow Santa scored one and presto- the whole system and tons of extra’s was sitting in front of the tree Tuesday morning. But the fun was far off.

I knew I couldn’t just plug and play. The mess of wires and components hiding behind our entertainment system couldn’t possibly digest one more piece of electronic equipment. It was time for major surgery.

I keep a box of electronic gear and wires in storage, and pulled it out for the trip up two floors to the family room. I knew I would need some combination of various plugs and wires so brought the whole gaggle of junk upstairs. I started the project at about 10AM the day after Christmas and by noon there was close to a dozen pieces of electronics, miles of wires and a giant TV rolled out and in the middle of the family room. It looked like a bomb had gone off in the control center of Jack Bauer’s CTU headquarters.

The work went on and on. I tried to optimize the space, find the best placement for various gear taking into consideration the distance to power outlets and length of power cords, stacking components that made sense together (i.e. satellite receiver and amp, etc), and the best way to logically move through all the options when the family was trying to enjoy the family room (satellite TV, DVD, VHS, CD, Xbox, Wii, TV guardian, Karaoke, phone, etc). By about 5PM I was finished and clean-up began. What an exhausting process... and Wii hadn't even played it yet.

Christmas- Day

Good news for all peoples! Christ is born in Bethlehem!

A wonderful morning with my wife and kids, a relaxing afternoon, and a huge Christmas dinner with extended family.

What could be better? I’ll tell you. My sister Carla volunteered to cook and host the annual family gathering at her house this year- the first year in… I don’t know how many… that Michelle didn’t have to rush around like a crazy person starting at 9AM Christmas morning to get a meal for 15+ people ready by 4PM in the afternoon.

A very restful and peaceful day, followed by a 30min drive to my sister’s that allowed us to just show up, eat and drink, and then leave.

Wow. I hope she does it again next year!

Do You Like Being A Mom?

Little kids have amazing thought processes. They are trying to think through, sometimes, deep and complicated issues with very simple immature minds. One of the few basic thought processes that most young children master first is cause and effect.

If I push this button, the light comes on. If I try to walk down the stairs, I will fall and hurt myself. If I throw food to the kitchen floor from my high chair, my mom or dad will repeatedly pick it up no matter how many times I do it in a row.

Many times cause and effect works as a scientific method of observing our world. But not always.

The other night before bedtime Michelle was making lunches for the coming school day. The whole family was spread out in the kitchen and the adjoining open great room engaged in various activities. I was on the couch working through my self-taught guitar lesson (currently learning to chord every Beatles song), K was on the computer pretending to do homework while chatting with 3-4 friends on Google Chat, L was doing homework and A was too. R, our 6 year old, was observing Michelle make lunches.

“Do you like being a mom?”

That was the question R had for Michelle after quietly observing her make lunches. Wow. We all stopped and looked up. What a deep question for a 6 year old to ask. What was going through her mind? Was she thinking about Michelle and how she is dealing with all of her sisters growing up so fast? The burden and pressure of taking care of a workaholic husband, keeping up the house, caring for 4 kids and trying to discover who she is as a person?

While the family paused in their activities and silently observed the conversation Michelle looked at R and said “Yes. Of course. Why do you ask?”

“Because you have a really mean look on your face while you’re making our lunches. I was just wondering if you like being a mom and having to do work.”

Rock, Paper, Scissors, Mud

Rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper. And somehow, though I have never really undertood this, paper beats rock. According to a tour guide at the Hoover Dam, what beats rock, or rather concrete, is really mud.

A couple weeks ago I braved the depravity of Las Vegas and brought my wife and four kids to sin city for several days vacation.

We avoided the strip at night, though did have to brave it a couple times around dinner time. Fortunately nothing to wacky happened other than the traveling billboard trucks with a scantily clad female on an ad with a message along the lines of “Lonely? Call me tonight!”

We went there for a couple reasons…the hot weather and cool refreshing pools at the MGM Grand (a cold snap hit Vegas while we were there), and the surrounding attractions (Hoover Dam, Red Rock Canyon, Lake Meade, etc).

On one of our day trips we stopped by a chocolate factory for a tour and samples, then headed to Hoover Dam. It is certainly an experience I will never forget- the massive concrete structure seemed almost beyond human ability to construct…and the massive turbines that the Colorado river flows through to power millions of homes and businesses were so large that when they were built the government had to first build forges and factories there at the building site because no form of transportation existed at the time to move these from any distance.

We took the full tour and traveled down hundreds of feet below the surface packed into a surprisingly large elevator with a rather animated and goofy tour guide. But I repeat myself.

On the tour a few questions were asked of the guide as we moved from the feeder tunnels, through the depths to the power station and then back up to the observation area. I had one question that our family had wondered about earlier on the tour- how long would this dam last? Or rather, how long did the designers think it would stand? We guessed amongst ourselves with my guess being the farthest out- I thought about 200 years. That seemed reasonable.

I asked the guide the question when we stopped to wait for the elevator up to the surface.
“This dam was built to last 2,000 years. But it wont really last that long…the sediment will build up against the dam and make it useless a few years before that.”

2 millennia. What has man made that was expected to last 2 millennia? Surely the pyramids, and perhaps a Roman or Greek building or two…but not too many things I think were built with this time frame in mind.

The Rise And Fall Of A Small Business

My mother is rather creative, coming up with ideas for products and businesses that she jumps in and tries. I think it’s where I got that trait from as well- though her track record for actually launching them is better than mine.

She called up recently and asked if I could help her launch an eBay store for a little doohickey thing she made several versions of and sold to a little gift shop near her home. She wanted to take a shot at retailing them herself online.

The Travel Jewelry Pouch is a nice idea- compact with little pockets for rings and necklaces, and a large area in the middle to hold oversized jewelry. She made them in tons of different colors and designs.

She came over the house on a Friday night and I helped her lay them out with jewelry for some product photos, edited and cropped them, and then set her up with an eBay and PayPal merchant account. I had her ready to load new products in no time at all.

Then the hard part came. What do you want to charge for these? She wasn’t sure, but thought $19.99 was reasonable. I did some quick competitive research and found some similar products online for as little as $5, but many at the $10 range. I asked her what her cost of goods were (knowing that she would not really know what I was talking about and I would get to tease her a bit) and she didn’t know. We walked through her cost of materials (fabric, rope cord, thread) and her time (took her about ½ hour to make one).

We came up with a cost of about $4 per item in materials, and another $5 in labor (assuming that she wanted to make $10 hour for her time). So, our rough COGS was $9, and assuming a cornerstone mark-up, that did put us in the $18 range. Problem. While her pouches were hand made with the finest materials and lovingly stitched together with top-notch designs, she still had to compete with Chinese made versions with crappy fake silk for $3.99.

We launched the store at $19.99. No bites. Tried a lower price. No bites. Oh well. At least she tried.

A Sicko, 2 Sleepyheads and a Lame Excuse

We missed church again. Not sure how many Sunday’s in a row we’re on now…4 or 5? Maybe more.

Contributing factors:

1) K & L went on a trip with my mom to help clean up the Duck River in TN. The volunteer effort was billed as a morning canoe trip picking up garbage on the river. It turned out to be an 8 mile trek on one of the hottest days so far this summer with a group of ill prepared people. Since it was supposed to be a short trip no one brought food or extra drink. At one point L had to beg a soda off of a fisherman and his son. When they finished about 3PM, they were sunburned, exhausted, and promising never to volunteer to clean up another river in their entire lives. Sunday morning K & L were just a wee bit hard to wake up.

2) Michelle is still not feeling well. Not sure whats going on, but she’s had a low grade fever for sometime now.

3) Work. I am heading to LA on Monday, and there is just too much that too many are counting on for me to get done.

Maybe next week.






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Before And After: The Garage

9:00AM- This should be fun and interesting. At least to me.

I will attempt to motivate and amaze myself as I tackle, with the help of my lovely wife Michelle and four wonderful daughters K, L, A & R, the cleaning and organization of our garage.

Our builder went a bit crazy on the garage. To say we have good storage space is an understatement. The garage has 4 bays for cars, a door to the patio, 2 large storage areas, plus a safe room/space if we have a really bad storm/tornado. All in the space is about 1500 square feet. Immense.

The work today will be exhausting, but I hope very successful. I am writing this before we begin. We shall see how it goes and what I write at the end of the day.

Here are the ‘Before’ pictures:

7:50PM- It is done.

My entire married life Michelle has teased me and given me a hard time for the way I organize a space. I learned it from my mom- take everything OUT of the space, throw it all about somewhere away from the space, then clean the empty space thoroughly, and finally, start to place the stuff back IN the cleaned space in an orderly and organized way. Michelle has always thought this was insane and added time and effort to the job. We have argued it many, many times, and Michelle always dismisses me as crazy for doing it my way.

Until today.

As we prepared for the task ahead I of course told her how I wanted it to go down. We would all work together to empty the ENTIRE garage of everything that is on or near the floor, dump it all into the driveway, clean the garage and spray for bugs, install the new shelving units I bought this morning, and then move everything back in. While doing the last part, separate out stuff for the dump and Goodwill.

She agreed and thought it was a good idea. Why? Was it the years of arguments, influence and her love for me and belief that I really do know best? Nope. It was a show called Mission: Organization on HGTV she recently watched. Seemed the organizational expert on the show said the best way to organize a space is….exactly the way I do it. But because some lady on TV said it, Michelle believes it now. So much for my influence.

Here are the after pictures:

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The Annual Pool Set-Up

Today we completed our families annual tradition of setting up our above ground pool. We have often thought about installing a real pool on the grounds- we have plenty of space- but two concerns haunt us and keep us from taking the plunge- so to speak.

Gary Ashton- our realtor who helped us buy this house. He would comment all the time that homes that have pools installed don’t really add any value to the home for most prospective buyers. They either have small children and a pool is a safety issue, or they just don’t want the hassle, expense and frustration of owning a pool. You end up cutting your prospective buyer ‘pool’ considerably by owning one.
Second reason- we have small children, and the thought of something happening to them, or a neighbor (we really only have one neighbor, but they have small children too) in our pool is enough to keep us from doing it.

So a few years ago we went and bought an Intex above ground pool. Not like those huge Watson Girl pools you see on TV installed nicely behind a trailer home, no, just a nice simple easy to install pool about 16 feet in diameter, 4 foot high. Good enough to get wet in and cool off on those burning hot summer days.

Problem is that ended up getting a pool just big enough to give me all the hassles of pool ownership. Pumps, filters, chlorine/bromine tablets, ph treatment, acidity test strips, algae preventer, shock cleaning treatments, and more. Setting up the pool is the start of a bunch of fun times with Michelle and the kids, and also the start of my new part-time job as pool cleaner.






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The Great Race

Occasionally Michelle and I will have to take two cars as we run errands or head out for the day, usually because of some unusual circumstance. Sometimes its Sunday morning at church when I have a meeting somewhere right after service, sometimes its out on errands because I need to swing by Home Depot and she has something earth-shatteringly important to get at Kohls after we see a movie.

Tonight, it was really unusual. Our van has taken ill. The transmission is bad, and a $3000+ repair bill awaits us at the end of the week. We headed out for softball games tonight all in one car (the 6 DigitalRich crew members), and planned on hooking up with my parents at the second game. They each drove their car to the game, and then gave one of them to Michelle to use for the week.

As we departed the last of two games around 9PM, Michelle was directly in front of me, and we kept it that way until we got to downtown Franklin. From there several routes are possible to reach our home, and often when these situations present themselves Michelle and I know exactly what to do. We race.

She takes one route; I take another, and most of the time I win. And I did again tonight. Sort of.

Michelle, pure and white as the wind-driven snow, always accuses me of secretly speeding when we are out of site of each other. She claims to always drive the speed limit. I believed her until tonight. Tonight I made a point of driving reasonably close to the limit. As I made my way through the side streets I hit each light just right, came to two stop signs with no other traffic, and made record time through town. I knew without a doubt I would win the great race.

As we made it through town and had to stop at the last light between us and home, Michelle was nowhere in site, and unless she took an obscure route, had to end up coming up behind me at some point. As we sat at the light and the cross traffic was moving through the intersection I felt the familiar warmth of assured victory flowing through my veins. The light turned yellow for cross-traffic, and readied to turn green for me. Out of the corner of my eye I saw a speed demon probably hitting just shy of 50MPH on the 30MPH street. As the car blew through the intersection, the light facing it turned red and mine turned green. I recognized the car- it was my dad’s Ford F150 being driven by my wife Michelle. She had beaten me. And she was speeding like a mad woman.

I turned through the intersection and took my humble second place position behind her for the remaining 8 miles of rural road before we got home. R, my 5 year old, was coming up with all sorts of solutions to help us still beat her. She wanted me to pass her over a double-yellow line. Then she suggested tearing through the grass in our yard when we got to our driveway (its 500 feet long). I told the girls it was over. We lost.

As we turned into our driveway behind Michelle a grinchy idea came to me. We circled around the front of the house and around the back to our garages in single-file, Michelle in the lead. When Michelle hit her garage door opener (she had taken it out of her van when we dropped it off at the shop), I hit mine too. And then I hit her button on my controller as well. Her door stopped halfway as mine opened all the way up. It took her too long to figure out what was happening. She thought something was wrong with the door, and sat 2 feet in front of it as I pulled in. It is well understood in our family that to win, you must pull INTO the garage all the way and turn the car off.

Victory is sweet.






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Bus Ride

My brother-in-law Nathan is a fine fellow. He endured a few years of torture and teasing from me while I dated his older sister (and my future wife Michelle), and sometimes I think back at the practical jokes I pulled with a bit of regret. A very little bit.

I never had a brother of my own, so I took out years of little brother treatment on him. Sometimes I had to manufacture scenarios and situations to tease him about, sometimes they landed in my lap like manna from heaven.

We all used to live in Gaithersburg Maryland, and one of the things our community was most proud about was their public transportation system. Ride-On busses were everywhere, and almost anyone in the town or it’s outskirts could walk out their front door, and be at a Ride-On bus stop in a couple minutes. The network of routes could take you almost anywhere. For students it was ideal- if you missed your school bus, you could hop on a Ride-On and still make it to school on time. Each route was 2-way, every bus stop had an identical sign or shelter across the street. One side took you in one direction, the other side in exactly the opposite.

One day Nathan missed his school bus. He checked to make sure he had 50 cents, and waited for the Ride On. The bus pulled up, Nathan climbed on board, paid his money and had a seat. As the bus started to roll Nathan asked the bus driver “this bus does go to Seneca Valley High School, right?”

The bus driver said- “This route does have a stop at the school, but your headed the wrong direction. You have to go to the other side.”

Nathan said thank you, then stood up and walked the two steps to the other side of the bus and sat down.







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