Friday, March 30, 2007

Victory And Defeat. And Victory. Then Defeat. Now Victory...

This has been a week of oscillating victories and defeats. Amazingly almost completely even score for each. Monday morning was a victory. Feel great. Top of the world. Monday afternoon defeat. Frustrated.

Tuesday morning started with a failure, only to be reversed with a huge score on a project. Feeling dizzy. Wednesday morning- bad news on a report. Frustrated and wanting to quit. Wednesday night- awesome late night meeting and progress with a clients project idea. Brilliant! Leave the meeting- dead battery and 2 hours before I’m in bed while my car is lonely without me in a parking lot 20 miles away. Depressed, tired and hungry. Jack in the box tacos at 11:30PM while my wife drives me home in the van.

Thursday morning got sweaty and grease stained buying and installing a new battery and battery connecters on my car. I show up for my lunch meeting with greasy jeans and hair all sweaty and crazy. No fun at all. Thursday afternoon- awesome progress on another project and a bright light is at the end of that tunnel.

Friday dawns with an email carrying some bad news. Another weekend with a ton of work to get things buttoned down. Friday afternoon was a touchdown. A sought after meeting finally happened and the gates opened up on a project for another client. Major progress. Feeling great.

I’m dizzy. I really don’t know what to think of this week. Part of me longs for the weeks with a clear message, one or the other- Win column! You did awesome! Things happened and stuff got done, the ball was moved down the field and you did a great job. Or- loser! Mistakes, project stiffed, mark it off, pick yourself up, take the grass out of your mouth and start fresh next week.

At least you finish the week with a focus. An understanding. You nailed it or you blew it. This past week I have no idea what to think.

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Your Friendly Neighborhood Nerd said...

This is how my last couple years at work have been. Because of the nature of my work, a lot of failures are really successes and vice-versa (I manage an engineering and validation laboratory).
Sometimes I don't know whether I should be happy that our lab found the product failure, or upset that there was a failure at all.

That said, I LOVE what I do.